vulnerable

just when i am feeling my most vulnerable and raw, God reaches down to sooth me and give me peace.


And the Lord spoke to Moses, saying: “Speak to Aaron and his sons, saying, ‘This is the way you shall bless the children of Israel. Say to them:

“The Lord bless you and keep you;
The Lord make His face shine upon you,
And be gracious to you;
The Lord lift up His countenance upon you,
And give you peace.”’

“So they shall put My name on the children of Israel, and I will bless them.”
Numbers 6:22-27

finally!

i am finally sitting down to think about my goals for the new year. what do i want to have accomplished by 2013. here is what i am currently thinking about:

-take a family vacation to an exotic location, possibly europe
-read a book (chapter of a book) to the boys each night and teach them all the traditional card games
-become pregnant or start the adoption process
-mentor a troubled kid once a week
-become fit and strong by working out 3 times a week consistently (a side benefit will be that i will reach my goal weight of 110-115)
-run a half-marathon in under 2 hours (not walk-run)
-replace my wardrobe with 50s style clothing
-start saving the money we were spending on debt (school loans, car loans, credit card) for retirement [$10,000-$20,000 minimum]
-find a job that makes me happy and content
-find a location for everything in our house and get rid of the clutter (a side benefit will be that we will no longer have to pay for a housecleaner)
-write a bible study and become published
-stop procrastinating and spend less time on the computer

what do you want to accomplish this year?

intentional

one word. one word to describe what you would like 2012 to bring.

i am throwing around 'increase', 'activeness', 'movement', 'determined', 'advance' and 'purposefulness'. can you help me narrow it down?

i am really leaning towards 'increase' since we want to add to our family, we want to up our giving to others, we would like to see a raise in hubby's job and i want to grow in my fitness (run a half-marathon in may, complete 90 days of a beachbody program and attend yoga on a consistent basis), but the other words appeal to me as well.

what would your one word be?

He loves us

this morning i was listening to a song that i've heard a million times before. maybe even heard a million and one times.

i started singing along. i not only heard myself sing the words, i felt them.

And oh, how He loves us so
Oh how He loves us
How He loves us all
Yeah, He loves us
Oh how He loves us
Oh how He loves us
Oh how He loves

go ahead. sing it. sing it with some heartfelt feeling to it. and see if you don't tear up too. He loves us. wow! how incredible is that?!?

things i want done in 2012

repaint the family room (light blue)
organize the boys' shoes, hats, gloves, winter coats, etc
empty the downstairs closet floor
purchase a black bookshelf for the eating nook
wainscoting for the dining room
hang new pictures/wall scones in the dining room
add a fireplace to the living room
new light in the upstairs closet
get the boys' football stickers up
drapes in all rooms
sidewalk and patio (cement)
build a workbench
research jobs-from-home
buy a king bed
sell car and bravada to buy a new vehicle
continue to declutter books!

top ten

this year:
16 people viewed my natural habits are not my best habits.

29 people viewed happy birthday to me!.

41 people viewed He designs my life.

72 people viewed perfect motivation.

90 people viewed my cup runneth over.

101 people viewed inspiration.

137 people viewed confidence.

148 people viewed it's the little things i love.

195 people viewed Godly judgment in human form.

244 people viewed work willingly.

one that i am surprised is not on the top ten list is simplify sunday.


**if you were one of the people that stopped by and read my ramblings, thank you! i hope to see you back in the new year!

proud

i'm proud to be an american, where at least i know i'm free. and i won't forget the men who died who gave that right to me, and i'd gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today. because there ain't no doubt i love this land! God bless the u.s.a.!

things i want done in 2011

repaint the family room (light blue)
organize the boys' shoes, hats, gloves, winter coats, etc
empty the downstairs closet floor
purchase a black bookshelf for the eating nook
wainscoting for the dining room
hang new pictures/wall scones in the dining room
add 2 chairs and a fireplace to the living room - *partial CHECK, new chairs/no fireplace*
reduce number of dvds - *CHECK*
clean desk out - *CHECK*
move bookshelves from office to upstairs - *CHECK*
new light in the upstairs closet
get the boys' football stickers up
drapes in all rooms
take toy box to the garage - *CHECK*
sidewalk and patio (cement)
build a workbench
find extra school supplies a home - *CHECK*
go thru scrapbook stuff - *CHECK*
research jobs-from-home
email the year's tax donations to hubby - *CHECK*
buy a king bed
sell car and bravada to buy a new vehicle
declutter books! - *CHECK*

the first day of may

may day. candy baskets. ringing the doorbell and running away. the kiss if caught. special childhood memories. today would have been my dad's 60th birthday. i made baskets for my neighbors in his honor. love you and miss you, dad.

outwardly simple and inwardly rich

what does God ask from us?

He has shown you, o man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God? ~Micah 6:8

he asks us to do three things:
1) act fairly
2) show compassion and kindness
3) be humbled in following the Lord's will

i want to keep this constantly in my mind as i struggle during my day.


Lord,
you show your perfection even in your requests about my behavior. you are more humble in your Godliness than i am in my fallen humanness. instill your requirements in my brain and in my heart and in my actions. hold me by the hand and rear me to your standard. i ache to be more caring and thoughtful to the family and friends around me. show me my failings. help me to honor You through the people i love, by surpassing their expectations of my graciousness in a supernatural way only You make possible. i am joyfully your child and your servant and your burden forever.
Amen.

currently

Books
Books
Stuff
Dust
Clutter
Boys Fighting
Company in four days
Books
Books
Volunteering
Bible Study
Clutter
Boys need attention
Company in three and a half days
Books
Books
Oy! Disorganization
Boys driving me crazy
Company in two and one quarter days . . .


Hanging in there.
Busy.

"There are 2 ways to get enough. One is to continue to accumulate more and more. The other is to desire less." ~G.K. Chesterton

He restores my soul

a friend's birthday cake, lots of wine, snacking on crackers, and sitting and scrapbooking all day are not good for my waistline, but are great for my disposition. i praise you, Lord, for these moments of fun.

in Christ alone my hope is found

here i am wanting. again. wanting the impossible. wanting my dad to call up the boys and ask them about their roller hockey game tomorrow. wanting his advice on adding a shower to the downstairs bathroom. wanting to show him the great deal on a shed we got off from craigslist. wanting moments that will make me 'happy'.

happiness is not found in moments or 'things'. it is found in God. i know this. i do.

how come it is so hard for my head to wrap around then?

looking forward, looking back

i don't know why but i am obsessed with posts on new year's resolutions this year. check out this one:

***

When I was a teacher a PIP was a professional improvement plan, I was never assigned one of those. For now, my PIPs are going to be my personal improvement projects, the things I'm going to work on this year. This list is just the beginning, I'm sure I will be adding to or changing it as time goes on.

My PIPs
1. House
I want to create a routine for cleaning and organizing my home and keeping it that way.

2. Time
I want to gain better control of the clock and calendar.

3. Money
I want to stay on budget, reduce debt, save more, use coupons effectively, be frugal and spend wisely.

4. Family
I want to spend personal time with each kid and help them learn to be responsible around house. I want to spend adult time with my husband.

5. Food
I want to meal plan every week, try new recipes each month, get the kids helping me prepare the meals and eat better by reducing the amount of packaged food and preservatives.


from http://goodenoughmommy.blogspot.com/2011/01/personal-improvement-projects-pips.html

elbow deep in the business of life

today my plans were waylaid. sometimes i guess that is how it goes. one son has influenza a and the other one has influenza b. so nice that they could both come visit at the same time. :)

stumbling along

trying to be faithful.